The positivity loop.
Positivity is hard to come by, if you’re a natural pessimist (like me). At least that’s what I thought for a long time. I just thought the person you are is the person you were meant to be and always will be. I didn’t realise that you could actually retrain your brain, unlearn behaviours and shift your perspective.
Sure, it’s constant work and it can be easy to fall back into old patterns.
On a personal level, 2022 has been all about personal development for me. I need to be the best version of myself, so I can show up wholly and authentically in my business, for you. I don’t want to be the negative Nancy on your feeds. I want to show you what is truly possible when you start believing it is — especially as a business owner.
The positivity loop is not about having a consistent stream of unending positivity — that’d be weird. But, instead it’s about a constant process of evolution. This state of being is all it takes to retrain your brain and unlearn behaviours.
There are six steps to this process loop to becoming a more positive person. A lot of work goes into personal change, but it’s a challenge that is only rewarding.
Observe
Observing your behaviour is the first step. You need to be self-aware of what is going on for you right now. Focus on your inner world and your current experience, situation, emotions and mindset. Just take note of what is going on.
Feel
Feel the emotions you need to feel. There are no ‘bad’ or ‘negative’ emotions. Whatever and however you’re experiencing something is totally fine. Just feel your way through it, don’t push anything down. You need to embrace this moment in time, so you can learn from it. It’ll be uncomfortable, but just think of this as an investment in your future self.
Accept
Now that you’ve felt all the feelings, it’s time to accept them. These steps can be done simultaneously for less complex emotions, but the deeper you dig, the more you might have to work through to get to this point. Sit with your feelings, acknowledge they’re there, accept and embrace them. Acceptance leads to trust in yourself and that everything will work out as it should.
Reflect
This is where we move into real work. Once you’ve moved pass the emotional state, you can now begin to learn from it. Reflect on where that emotion came from. What triggered it? Is their past experiences influencing it? How did it make you feel on a physical level? What can you be learning from it?
Try reframing something negative into a teaching. Use the following sentence structure: I’m learning [insert teaching here] from [describe the situation]. This will allow me to [positive outcome] in the future.
Act
Sometimes this process takes minutes, or it can take days. Whatever it looks like for you is okay. But now it’s time to act according to your intuition.
What do you want to do with this newfound knowledge of your emotions?
How can you make a shift to embrace a more positive outlook?
What does that look like?
What does that feel like?
Grow
Now it’s time to remember this for next time and move past it. It’s time to grow and not let your negative/overpowering emotions take such a strong hold. This is your chance to put into action the learnings up to this point to really shift your mindset to a more positive outlook.
An effective way to embed these new learnings, is to remember how it feels. Take stock of how you feel in your body. Notice the little, positive changes around you. What has changed?
Taking control of my emotional state, especially as a business owner, has allowed me to show up confidently, with purpose and conviction. I can show up as a whole person, who can be emotionally vulnerable, raw and real.
Only positive things can happen when you decide to make a change for the better. You’ve got this!